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Girl I used to be a whole wreck and a half! I punished myself with food by binge eating until I felt physical pain. I felt bad about it, then kept eating to soothe my pain. I refused to rest, slow down, or take vacations because I felt things in my life would fall apart if I stopped for even a moment. I had a bad attitude and instead of learning to cope with it, I just worked myself into exhaustion more. I literally spent my whole day running from job to job supporting others and putting everybody else before myself. I never celebrated myself because nothing ever felt like enough. It was because I didn't feel like I was good enough. From the outside looking in I looked like I had it all together. I'd moved all across the country, gotten multiple degrees, and was granted so many amazing opportunities. Honestly, I prided myself on having done all of the "right" things, yet, I still wasn't happy or fulfilled.
But deep down I always had this feeling that if I could get passed myself, fix my mindset & change some of my behaviors then I could really be the woman I always wanted to be. And that's exactly what I did.
That's why I coach the woman who KNOWS that if she could just get some support in unlearning her bad habits then her dreams are within her reach. I coach the woman that DREAMS of a life that actually matches up to the life others think she has. I coach the woman who TRIES her hardest but can’t seem to create lasting changes in her life. I coach the woman who is SICK & TIRED of not accomplishing her goals. Sis, I coach women just like you.
And this is what I realized, accolades don't make you happy, looking like you have it all together when you really don't doesn't mean a damn thing, you don't get a prize for putting everyone before yourself, and when you don't take care of you, you'll keep settling for less than you deserve and stay stuck in cycles of self-sabotage.
This is what my self-sabotage looked like:
Saying yes to things I desperately wanted to say no to.
Overpacking my schedule with obligations that drained me.
Getting in toxic relationships just to have some attention.
Procrastinating on pursuing my goals because I put other people first.
Refusing to set boundaries and getting caught in everyone's drama.
Giving up before trying because I was convinced I couldn't do "it".
I know exactly what it’s like to be in that place. I know what it's like to feel stuck. But since I’m not in that place anymore I can tell you from experience that your life will change the moment you decide you're sick of your BS and that you DESERVE more. It's okay to need support and a strategy. If you could have done it alone you would have done it on your own already girl. It's time to do it differently. It's time to show up for yourself in a ways that you never have before so that you can get the results you've always wanted.
As a proud Howard University alumna, Seanita holds a Bachelor's degree in Psychology with a minor in African American studies. Additionally, with great pride, Seanita earned a Master's degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Syracuse University. Most recently, Seanita obtained her second master's degree in psychology from Fuller Theological Seminary, where she is currently pursuing a doctorate degree in clinical psychology. Seanita's research interests include African American women, spirituality, mental health and wellness. With her expertise in the aforementioned disciplines, Seanita has positioned herself to uniquely serve Black women as a life coach. As the founder of Ceaseless Pursuit Coaching, Seanita helps Strong Black Women do real self-care so they can stop self-sabotaging, stop settling, and start experiencing joy.